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PUNCHDRUNK LOVE? (ACADEMY AWARDS RESULTS 2022)

There's an episode of 'Frasier' where his brother Niles is excited to be nominated for a Seabee - Seattle's coveted radio award.

Frasier is hosting the awards ceremony and is also nominated.

However when Niles turns up, he soon realises he isn't present at the main ceremony.

Instead he's directed to the Napoleon Room in the hotel which is "just down to the basement, cross through the kitchen to the hall" to a room named after the French Emperor "because its ceiling is low".

Later, after realising he was a nominee in the technical awards, Niles is excited to see wine at the main ceremony which they didn't serve at his.

"You see, I was the only nominee dressed in black tie, except for the one man in front wearing a tuxedo T-Shirt," he mournfully tells his brother.

"At least, I didn't come home empty handed. 

"We each received one of these handsome certificates, which were given out after we'd folded our tables and stacked our chairs."

Nominees in the eight Oscar categories of  Make Up and Hairstyling, Documentary Short, Film Editing, Original Score, Animated Short, Sound, Production Design and Live Action Short should console themselves that at least they got to be in the room for the main ceremony.

However they were made to feel like second class citizens as their moments of glory occurred away from the live televised portion of the Academy Awards.

That meant the rest of the world watching on TV had to make do with edited footage of Riz Ahmed receiving a Best Live Action Short Oscar for his film 'The Long Goodbye'.

Hans Zimmer wasn't even present to receive his Best Original Score statuette for 'Dune'.

It just didn't feel right.

All eyes, however, were on the battle of the streaming giants vying to be the first to win Best Picture.

In the end, AppleTV+'s 'CODA' emerged victorious, denying Netflix the prize it has long coveted.

Sian Heder's film about a deaf family in a fishing community in Massachusetts and their talented daughter who can hear won all three categories it was nominated for, including Best Adapted Screenplay and Best Supporting Actor for Troy Kotsur.

But while it was undoubtedly a sweet natured tale, did 'CODA' really deserve to edge out Jane Campion's accomplished Western drama 'The Power of the Dog' in the Best Picture race or even Kenneth Branagh's most ambitious and personal project to date, the semi-autobiographical 'Belfast'?

No but this felt like a case of the heart ruling the heads of Academy voters who were undoubtedly touched by Heder's film during its late awards season surge. 

While 'CODA's victory was remarkable for a movie that wasn't even regarded as a frontrunner at the start of awards season, this year's Oscars will probably be remembered as the year when Will Smith lost his cool and slapped Chris Rock.

After the comedian made a dodgy wisecrack at the expense of Smith's wife Jada about her hair loss, the eventual Best Actor winner stormed onto the stage and hit him.

He then proceeded to harangue Rock from his table, telling him in the saltiest of terms to leave his wife out of his jokes.

A stunned Rock told an equally stunned audience: "Will Smith just smacked the sh*t out of me," before quipping they had just created a moment of television history.

It was a remarkably sour moment in a ceremony which had tried desperately to be upbeat.

The producers even had a Gospel choir deliver a surprisingly joyous soundtrack to the 'In Memoriam' section, singing 'Spirit in the Sky' as images of those who passed away flashed up behind them.

This divided viewers, with some Twitter users loving the change in tone and others feeling it was too disrespectful and like something out of a parody. 

When he won Best Actor for 'King Richard', Smith delivered a teary, rambling acceptance speech about being a protector of his family and a vessel for love.

But that latter sentiment seemed at odds with his actions earlier in the ceremony which even he appeared to realise, apologising and saying he hoped the Academy would have him back.

There was also a nod to fellow nominee Denzel Washington who he said had told him to be careful as the Devil comes at a person's greatest moment.

Jessica Chastain won the Best Actress race for 'The Eyes of Tammy Faye' and also talked about love, denouncing "bigoted" legislation in several US states undermining the LGBTQ community.

Unsurpisingly, Ariana DeBose picked up the Best Supporting Actress for the same role in 'West Side Story' that Rita Moreno won for in 1961 and made history as the first openly queer actress to take home an Academy Award.

“Now you see the meaning behind ‘I Want To Be In America,’" she observed.

"Because even in this weary world we live in, dreams do come true.”

Kotsur gave an emotional speech as he made history as the first deaf man to win an acting award.

Dedicating the award to his father who was paralysed in a car accident, he also delivered a typical joke, recalling that while visiting President Joe Biden and Dr Jill Biden in the White House: "I was planning on teaching some dirty sign language but Marlee Matlin told me to behave myself."

Both 'The Power of the Dog' and 'Belfast' didn't go away empty handed, though.

Jane Campion took the Best Director prize after another rambling speech from a previous recipient Kevin Costner and rather endearingly read her acceptance speech from a crumpled sheet.

At the eighth attempt, Kenneth Branagh finally won an Academy Award in the Best Original Screenplay category and mentioned the passing of his friend John Sessions and Jamie Dornan's father Jim in a classy acceptance speech.

As he signed off, he told the audience: "We will never forget all of those lost in the heartbreaking, heartwarming, human story of that amazing city of Belfast on the fabulous island of Ireland."

It was a great night for 'Dune' which picked up six statuettes for Best Score, Best Cinematography, Best Visual Effects, Film Editing, Best Production Design and Best Sound.

Greg Frasier's win in the cinematography category meant Ari Wenger missed out on a chance to make history for 'The Power of the Dog' as the first woman to ever win the award.

As predicted, Japan's Ryusuke Hamaguchi's 'Drive My Car' won Best International Feature, Disney's 'Encanto' won Best Animated Feature and Questlove won Best Documentary Feature for Hulu's 'Summer of Soul (Or.. The Revolution Will Not Be Televised)'.

That meant, though, that Jonas Poher Rasmussen's wonderful Danish animated documentary 'Flee' went home empty handed.

Billie Eilish looked genuinely thrilled when she and her brother Finneas O'Connell took the Best Original Song award for the title track of the 007 movie 'No Time To Die'.

This meant Lin Manuel Miranda, who was nominated in the category for 'Dos Oruguitas' in 'Encanto,' will have to wait a bit longer to join the EGOT club of winners of Emmy, Grammy, Oscar and Tony awards.

As for the ceremony itself, there were some embarrassing moments including a toe curling Best Actor presentation from Samuel L Jackson, Uma Thurman and John Travolta full of lame 'Pulp Fiction' jokes. 

Lady GaGa handled herself brilliantly alongside a frail, wheelchair bound Liza Minnelli during the Best Picture presentation. 

However there was a surprisingly low energy moment when Al Pacino and Robert de Niro stood onstage looking like they were waiting for a bus while the director Francis Coppola rambled on about the 50th anniversary of the release of 'The Godfather'.

South Korean boyband BTS gushed in a clip about their love of Guy Ritchie's version of 'Aladdin,' - go figure?

The Academy's public vote for the Oscars Fan Favourite and Biggest Cheer Moment also illustrated why it would be dumb to allow fanboys to decide any other Oscar categories with 'Army of the Dead' and 'Justice League' winning the two rather meaningless votes.

As for the hosts, Amy Schumer, Regina Hall and Wanda Sykes were saddled with some dreadful gags.

A moment where they donned Spiderman, Richard Williams and Tammy Faye Bakker costumes was very flat.

But that was nothing compared to Schumer's stilted moment where she pretended Supporting Actress nominee Kirsten Dundst was an usher, so she could flirt with her partner and Supporting Actor nominee Jesse Plemons.

Schumer did manage to land some great gags in a well judged monologue, including how Leonardo DiCaprio had "done so much to fight climate change and leave behind a cleaner, greener planet for his girlfriends".

Referring to 'Being the Ricardos,' she quipped: "If you're Aaron Sorkin, how do you make a movie about the most iconic female comedian (Lucille Ball) and not one laugh?

"It's brilliant! It's like making a biopic about Michael Jordan and just showing the bus trips between games."

She also landed a comedic punch at the expense of Will Smith's 'King Richard,' noting "after years of Hollywood ignoring women's stories, we finally got a story about the Williams sisters' ... dad."

Little did we know, though, that it would be an actual blow from Will Smith that would provide the biggest talking point in a show that is clearly still trying to figure itself out in the social media age.

Oddly, Smith provided a social media moment but for all the wrong reasons in what will go down as one of the most shameful nights in Oscars history.

Best Picture: CODA

Best Director: Jane Campion (The Power of the Dog)

Best Actor: Will Smith (King Richard)

Best Actress: Jessica Chastain (The Eyes of Tammy Faye)

Best Supporting Actor: Troy Kotsur (CODA)

Best Supporting Actress: Ariana DeBose (West Side Story)

Best Foreign Language Feature: Drive My Car

Best Animated Feature: Encanto

Best Documentary Feature: Summer of Soul (Or.. When The Revolution Could Not Be Televised...)

Best Original Screenplay: Kenneth Branagh (Belfast)

Best Adapted Screenplay: Sian Heder (CODA)

Best Cinematography: Greig Fraser (Dune)

Best Original Score: Hans Zimmer (Dune) use

Best Original Song: Billie Eilish and Finneas O'Connell ('No Time to Die' from 'No Time To Die') 

Best Visual Effects: Dune

Best Film Editing: Dune

Best Sound: Dune 

Best Production Design: Dune

Best Costume Design: Cruella

Best Make Up and Hairstyling; The Eyes of Tammy Faye

Best Live Action Short: The Long Goodbye 

Best Animated Short: The Windshield Wiper 

Best Documentary Short: The Queen of Basketball 

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